


Burritos, Batkids, and Beans, Oh My!

by soul_droid



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Burritos, Desperation over stupid stuff, Gen, Somebody get some more beans for the love of God
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-06 19:52:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14064327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soul_droid/pseuds/soul_droid
Summary: How. Am I supposed to make Burritos. Without Beans?!





	Burritos, Batkids, and Beans, Oh My!

Oh, this was just perfect. As Dick stared into the fridge, he knew this was likely not going to end well. Still, he had hope. So, he looked into the cabinets. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Hey—nope. He slammed the last cabinet door, and looked down in defeat. Over at the kitchen entrance, Tim and Jason stood there, watching him.

“It’s over...” Dick said, dejectedly. “We don’t have any refried beans...”

“Huh?” Tim asked, rather sure that he had seen an unopened can or two lying around. Alfred had broken his leg recently, and as a result, it was up to everyone as individuals to make their own food.

“What dick thought it was a good idea to have burrito night?” Dick asks, looking up toward the sky, and sighing

Jason pipes ups, and supplies “You. You were the one who wanted burrito night.”

“I know.”

“And didn’t plan in advance.”

“It was a spur of the moment thing, Jason!”

“Then wait for tomorrow!”

“What if I don’t want burritos tomorrow?! Besides, we passed that burrito truck on the way home, and I started wanting burritos!”

“Well, then why didn’t you buy them at the truck?!”

“Because making my own is cheaper!”

“We have Bruce Wayne’s money!”

“And do you carry your wallet inside your uniform?! Because I know I don’t!”

“... Okay, fine, you make a point.”

Tim starts walking toward Dick and the cabinets “Wait a minute...” He opens the cabinet Dick is in front of, and pulls out a can of refried beans. “We have the low-sodium beans.”

At once, Dick and Jason both said “We don’t have beans.”

“Guys, they taste virtually the same!”

“Fine!” Jason says “Then next time you run into a hostage situation, you can virtually save someone!”

“Really, guys? Besides, these are healthier for you!”

“Tim!” Dick explains “If I wanted “healthy”, I wouldn’t be eating a burrito!”

“Well, all the stores are closed, so you have to deal with it.” He says, grabbing the can-opener. “Besides, I already baked up the fish, so I’m not waiting for this anymore.”

“Who puts fish into burritos?” Jason asks himself

“You sound like Steph...”

Dick mutters “Well, she’s right...”

“No, she’s not!”

As he was about to retort, Dick saw Jason turn around, and walk outside the kitchen. Following him, he asks “What are you doing?”

Jason stops in the middle of the front room. He turns his head toward his older brother. With a stony expression, and determination in his voice, he explains “Being a hero. I know a small-time department store across town that has beans. If I hurry... I can make it before they close!”

Dick gasps. Pulling his feet together, balling his left fist, and giving a salute with his right, he gives his brother a bit of necessary encouragement. “Godspeed, you magnificent son of a bitch.”

  
\--

Thanks for reading, guys. I made this right after I was rendered incapable of using anything except low-sodium beans, so don’t worry, I know accurately what this is like. And for the record, yes, my burritos had fish in them.


End file.
